People of the Internet, I need to get something off of my chest. It's, well, my chest. It's, um, huge. I'm a thick girl with jiggly parts, as Niecy Nash would say. Or, as I would say, an obese fashionless manatee. This has lead to the development of a rack that some people would pay for. Let me rephrase. They would pay for the size. They certainly would not pay for the droop.
To be as blunt as possible – I hate my boobs. They are big. They get in the way. They require industrial-sized bras that don't come in cute sizes. There's no cute shit when you get into triple hooks people. We're talking thick straps with potato sacks. Underwire is not a choice in my world. It's not a novelty. You go with it and pray it doesn't pierce your skin when your body decides to re-enter puberty again during the middle of the work day.
I always swore I would never ever get plastic surgery. Know what? Screw that. I'd get these things chopped off in a second if I could afford it. Except I know the doctors would be all, um, you are overweight, so you need to do what Punky Brewster did and lose the weight before we consider this. Then, I've got to deal with the fact that my stupid hypothyroid won't let me lose weight like a normal human.
If I lose weight, maybe they will go away and I'll be left with two really sad little balloons that flap in the wind. That's fine. Then lugging them around won't hurt so damn much. But, what if I lose weight and they are still here???? I fear that I could lose weight, be a little petite blonde thing with giant boobs. Then I'm going to look like I've had implants. Then it will look like I paid for them. Gah.
In conclusion: Dear my boobs, I hate you. Good night.
No related posts.
Moral of the story: Punky Brewster ruined it for the rest of us.
I too dream about getting my boobs done. Reduced and then lifted. Do other women have nipples that point somewhere besides their toes? Inquiring minds want to know.
I just don’t even want to talk about it. I’ll cry.
Anything over a C cup is usually considered medical unless you have crap insurance. I would at least see how much it would cost you, make the appointment and get the consultation. I paid to have mine done, had a baby and they came BACK!!!!!!! I also hate mine and I think ladies who get breast implants are IDIOTS since I cant get mine to go away.
awww…